It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
