So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
