Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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