new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
