did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
