You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
