Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
