Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
