What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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