wake up i wanna do it froggy style
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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