Pregnant stripper...not hot.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
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