Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
