Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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