Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
