I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
