It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
