She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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