Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize