so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
