The brown eye won't let me do that either.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
They have beer where we have blood.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
