if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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