I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
i think we sleep fucked last night...
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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