I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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