So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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