there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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