Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize