Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
