so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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