Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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