a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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