What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
