ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Never joke about your clitoris.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize