hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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