so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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