Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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