She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
