I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
