He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
