i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
