My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
