is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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