oh god the rape fog is back!
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
