He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
