What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
