How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
