Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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