I got chris browned last night
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
