he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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