love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
