Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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